All right so on the last post I asked for questions and here are the answers -

From Mmm Bunnies:

What's the timespan for Year Zero?

Technically two months for the main events - it starts in mid-May, goes through the whole of June and ends a couple of weeks in July.

What is your favorite color?

Purple, white, gray, red, blue... Cool colors mostly but purple has been my favorite ever since I started using crayons.

What do you usually wear? (Ex: Jeans & t-shirt, dresses, leotards, etc.)

Comfort is what I think of first both outside and at home. Outside I normally wear jeans (not that I have much of a choice since I live in a male-dominated household - has six step-brothers, seven if you count the adopted one who lives abroad, and two step-sisters who also live abroad) and loos shirts or tank-tops with a jacket/sweater. I do like girly clothes and would like to wear skirts (the long kind since it's tedious when you have to buy pants) or dresses so I settle for camisoles. And on my good days out or to school I wear blouses with the sleeves tucked to the elbow.

Where do you find your user avatar/icon/thingies?

Here mostly and sometimes here. Or I crop pictures - but that takes a lot of time and I'm lazy.

Random-ass questions pulled of the internet:

When are you most alert? Morning or night?

Nighttime. I'm fairly nocturnal come summertime. Plus, I like the eerie silence sometimes - though creepy - it's soothing. plus, people are less likely to bother you about anything... Though you have to watch out for those dark hallways though...

Do you prefer to be inside or outside?

Depends. If it's hot, I'll stay inside. If it suddenly began to snow or rained, I'll go out for a walk or two around the neighborhood. I don't get out much so I prefer inside naturally. Now, if it wasn't such a hassle to go outside I would go out more frequently (not that there's much to see).

At what temperature are you most comfortable? When you are hot, cold, warm?

Warm. But it depends too, especially if it's winter you'd want to be warmer. If it's hot you'd want it to be cold. :| I'm indecisive and it's become habit to assess both situations.

Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?

Closed... Don't want things to come out there you know? >.>

Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel?

...No. But my mom's been known to do that. I think there's a bag full of them tucked somewhere...

Do you like to use post-it notes?

I do. In fact I've been using sticky notes to help with outlines for the chapters and such. The bright colors help me focus on that needs to be done.

Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees?

A bear. A big rolling bear. I can't stand bees or insects or anything with more legs than necessary. Hell, bees fly too. Who would avenge me after they fly away? Actually, how?!

Do you always smile for pictures?

With braces? No. But it's getting easier. I actually want to smile and laugh in public without covering my mouth. >.>

What is your biggest pet peeve?

Probably people slamming doors/cabinets/drawers of any kind. Even moreso than my dislike for annoying pushovers...

Do you ever count your steps when you walk?

I've tried and got distracted, then tried again. I ended up forgetting the number I left off on when I turned around to see the other end of the street.

Do you ever dance even if there's no music playing?

If I'm in a good mood...I might do that but stop immediately because I know how silly I look.

Do you chew your pens and pencils?

Nope. That's another pet peeve. You let someone borrow your pen/pencil and then they return it with bite marks... I let them keep it. I'm not really a germaphobe. I just don't like having something that was once in someones mouth or gnashing at it with their teeth - my imagination tends to overreact about these kinds of things.

What is your Song of the week?

The Used cover for Burning Down the House by Talking Heads. The original sounds so...weird. Loved it after watching Transformers 2 with friends... It was an all right movie. >.>


Do you still watch cartoons?

Heck. Yes. But not so frequently atm.

What movies could you watch over and over and still love?

Silent Hill, Spirited Away, Howl's Moving Castle...a lot if I had the time.

Can you change the oil on a car?

I can try. I've seen my dad enough to not try it for myself.

Ever gotten a speeding ticket?

I don't own a car so no.

Ran out of gas?

By being literally exhausted that you can't move anymore - then yes.

Favorite kind of sandwich?

A friend made me try this - it was just lettuce, cheese, ham, in halves of a croissant. Good stuff.

What is your usual bedtime?

...Lately, sometime deep in the morning hours.

Are you lazy?

Must that really be answered? >.>

Afraid of heights?

Used to and now I can enjoy rollercoasters! Woo! *half-hearted smile* Another pet peeve: rollercoaster pictures. You're caught up in the moment and your screaming face is caught on a camera and is shown at the end of the ride... What is riding a rollercoaster supposed to be glamorous?

Sing in the car?

I have.

Dance in the shower?

...Tried.

Dance in the car?

Kind of nicked my elbow that time and I suddenly felt dizzy.

Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?

A florist. Then I wanted to be a psychiatrist before I changed to psychologist. Then an artist for my writer friend. And then I wanted to be a writer. I changed again but this time to an Illustrator (but that doesn't seem to be working out). And now I'm back to just writing. It's too stressful to think about what you're going to be doing in the future.

Do you believe in ghosts?

I don't, yet I do. Either way, anything dead or anything we perceive as dead is creepy.

Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?

Too many to count.

Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?

Holy... YES. >:-|

Take a vitamin daily?

Yep.

Wear slippers?

Absolutely. You try wearing fuzzy socks (this was during winter) and walking on a wooden floor. It almost never ends well.

First concert?

A Britney Spears one with my cousin who didn't want to go alone. It was fun and it was a school night too. For the rest of that week I was so exhausted that I couldn't hold a pencil right.

Ever won a spelling bee?

In the fifth grade... They tried to trick me with a silent letter I think. I was so nervous.

Have you ever cried because you were so happy?

Plenty of times. I also cry when I laugh really hard. It gets worse when they join in because I won't be able to stop laughing!

Who would you like to see in concert?

The Used, Muse or Nine Inch Nails... That'd be awesome.

Can you swim well?

Just barely. I can float as long as I don't panic... *panics then drowns* I stay at the shallow end only because I have issues with deep water.

Are you patient?

Yes but I snap at times and it isn't pretty.

Do you want to get married?

Not sure yet.

Do you have kids?

o.o No.

Do you want kids?

>.>'' Still undecided...

Do you miss anyone right now?

Now? I can't really say no so sure why not? I miss a lot of things.

Wee! A Personality Test!

Apparently my personality type is:

Quiet, reflective and idealistic. Interested in serving humanity. Well-developed value system, which they strive to live in accordance with. Extremely loyal. Adaptable and laid-back unless a strongly-held value is threatened. Usually talented writers. Mentally quick and able to see possibilities. Interested in understanding and helping people.

Some careers that would fit me are:

Writers, artists, counselors, social workers, English teachers, fine arts teachers, child care workers, clergy, missionaries, psychologists, psychiatrists, scientists, political activists, editors, education consultants, journalists, religious educators, social scientists.

I'm more:

Introverted, Intuitive, Feeling and Perceiving.

How strange that that personality test got me spot on. o.o Okay, that was a lengthy post... Will probably post something else soon but now, sleep. *dozes on the keyboard*

Uncertainties & shaky hands
make for a nervous gait
but who's eyes broaden upon the lands
searching for the road to Dream

Another SongPost just for fun. :) And because I like linking stuff even if I've linked them before (check post True). Not a lot is going on and I've been reading about the USSR like crazy for a History paper and other things and the information is kind of overwhelming but it's all good. Just found out I might be going to Canada this summer... More characterization and sad stuff *hits self b/c she can't write anything not sad and depressing*. Darn Silent Hill music. I love it so much.

xD Can you tell I'm trying to avoid using the character names?

+ + + Heaven's Night—"There's still happiness"

The Heaven's Night festival was held on this one day of the year where everyone, since this being a very small town, would gather in the highest clearing, yards from the town. It was called "One Star Hill" because of the myth that a star fell there long ago in the past that made the land what it was. The town's name isn't that special and has had a history of conquerors and battalions trampling over this land for the people beyond—those that have reason to call trouble like that, the ones with fortifications and riches beyond us peasants. As a whole, this town has been rebuilt over and over all because of the motto the council chose thusly: In somnis veritas or "In dreams there is truth."

It was said that this town was the epitome of dreams, where you are able to dream because how this town functions looks all so simple...from the surface. But I'm not saying that I know how and what the council deals with on a daily basis but everyone that lives here has so much pride and hope for this tiny town...

Dreams. Hope. Heaven's Night... All make me think of fairytales. Can this town, it's civilians; is this all a big fairytale? If that's so, let it stay that way, if not for me then for everyone else.

The street on which I walk now, the narrow paved path with quaint dusty brown buildings lining the sides. Steel and iron painted a shiny black were the lights that appeared at so-and-so interval of pavement, baskets of greenery and fragrant flowers brightening the path. The sun was just setting so the lights themselves were being lit one by one as I walked past this all too familiar road.

Many people I knew passed me by, all huddled close with their companions and shivering in their coats and gloves. Though enamored with their lover or in a heated conversation, they gave me a short glance before turning away. Smiles, small and maybe even hopeful, were etched on their faces. I knew what they were thinking about. I knew that they knew where I was going, who I was visiting; they'd seen me far too often. I blushed, pulling my cap down at the same time.

The more I walked, the more and more empty the street became. Buildings began to disperse as wider, loner snowscapes met my eye and trees spotted the white all around me. My hands in my pockets I continued this dirt path, trudging on the incline. A carriage just passed me by; I heard the whistling and chugging of a train in the distance. It was close now, the house, though a bit near the mouth of the woods, gated but tiny—a cottage. The husband worked in the town, the mother stayed at home, she stayed at home as well, save for the occasion of school.

I'd met her a very long time ago and had been by her since then with the permission of her parents. I with my father by my side and my mother gone with a lover and a child of her own—a brother can you believe that? With the two being acquainted in business ventures and both on good terms, I was able to come and go to their house at any time. I remember my father laughing at how suddenly active I'd become since I was born not in the best of health...

And here I am now, about to knock on the door. From here I could hear a faint singing, footsteps and the crackling of a fire. I knocked and in a few seconds the mother, with her kind but wan face, let me in with a smile, urging me to sit by the fire and rest. I did and could never have been more thankful.

+ + +

It was a dark clear sky with no moon. The only lights we could see were from the stars and the square in the town accompanied with low cheers and music. Eventually, one by one, the lights would shut off and the civilians, with candles in their hands resembling fireflies in the summer, would make the pilgrimage to the hill and watch the sky. There were groups and broken lines, like blotches in the snow, who'd sit quietly or play around for everything was silent and their joyous cries could be heard miles away—where we were sitting.

It would stay like that until the night air became unbearable but till then, a fire would be created and everyone would sit closer to hear the stories and myths of olde from the mouths of the civilians themselves. While that happened, the lights of the patrol could be seen fading in and out of the dark crevices of the town, guards were posted by the possible entrances where any danger but that rarely happened.

The bench we were sitting on was crafted by my father but the location as to which it was to be placed was suggested by Leander, her father. His excuse was because it was always nice to look out from a high place. And it's wonderful, especially in the springtime when all the greenery and flowers looked their finest. Now that I think about it...it does sound like a fairytale. I mentioned this to her and she smiled but she seemed more lost in her thoughts. I asked her what was wrong and she snapped back to her normal self.

"Everything is fine," she had said. People said that when they were not fine.

I didn't push the subject. There was something about living for so long with this girl that made one almost know what she was thinking in a single glance. There was also the definite tightening of the edges of her lips; sometimes they'd be little tugs, as if all she wanted to do at the moment was frown. Then there was a certain look to her face and—as if aware of the deep slant of her brow—the modest dip of her head caused her hair to partially obscure her profile where she, following that, would brush it over her ear with white frozen fingers. The slant looked less severe but it remained nonetheless.

She was definitely not saying something that needed to be said. And I, noticing how this observation of her mannerisms struck me as a little...creepy. Turning away, even though she hadn't noticed my staring, I thought of what I could do. She was the type to, say, "suffer quietly." Even then, when we first met, she was quiet around other children and was always left behind like a shadow. When she was alone with her mother and father, she was the opposite... Maybe it has something to do with her parents... Probably—

"What are you thinking about?" Her voice clear and loud in the silence, like the hourly bells.

Her face was turned towards me... Has she been like that for some time? I pulled my cap closer. I thought of what I'd been doing earlier and couldn't help but be guilty.

She then looked to the gathering below, leaning forward, then she looked up. She gasped. Breaking out into a wide smile, she suddenly took my arm, the same one still holding onto the cap. Startled, the thing practically flew from my fingers to the snowy ground. I really should keep a better grip on that hat really...

"Did you see? Did you see?" she said, exasperated.

I shook my head. I asked her what it was it she saw and she replied—

"It was a shooting star... No. There were two—no"—she blinked, trying to recall the number of stars she saw fall—"Oh, there were a couple I know but one of them was very bright, like it was going to crash onto the hill like the myth."

I replied that it was probably a good omen and that the town was going to prosper. That everyone was guaranteed happiness since the year was ending soon.

She was still for a moment, her smile diminishing into a grin. Then, she nodded, leaving my side in order to pick up the hat, brushing the snow from the material. Instead of giving the hat to me she put it on, mimicking the walk and talk of a man. We laughed and she seemed to be in better spirits, sitting back down with a satisfied exhale as a chill shook her frame. She returned the hat to me as she relaxed onto the bench. I could see that the revelry was but a temporary reprieve from her thoughts for she looked as if she was about to cry... I hesitated but I placed the hat over her head, her sad eyes.

I thought she was going to smile, maybe even laugh and take "revenge" as she always did. But she didn't. She took my arm as before and leaned on it, the cap stayed so I couldn't see much but her nose and the tip of her chin. Soon, tears rolled from her cheeks and she'd inhale through her nose constantly, her grip round my arm tightening—if it was any tighter bloodflow would stop entirely in it's tracks. But it didn't hurt.

I really didn't mind but I felt as if she expected something from me and I felt idiotic that I couldn't just read her mind and find out how to offer solace on what she wouldn't tell me.

+ + +

We both sat there, the crowd dispersing slowly. Some lights, the streetlights mainly, were turned on in the town, there were some lights in some of the buildings too. She still wouldn't say anything but the tears had stopped. Her breathing was still uneven but, other than that, she was all right.

"Look up," I said, "Before the stars are gone."

She didn't. This, and my overall helplessness in these kinds of situations was slightly irritating me. I knew that there were things that people were supposed to and not supposed to do when in situations like this, or so I've heard. Then there was the fact that I had no idea what she was so worried and sad about... I took the plunge and just asked.

She had to repeat her answer, having to clear her throat first because her voice was watered down—"Mama is dying."

So it did have something to do with her parents... Ah, I still felt like an idiot and wanted to die in some obscure place. Again, she went against my expectations and looked at me with those large watery eyes but only for a second. She looked away, down, onto her lap then went ahead to removing the cap hitting me square in the face with it.

"But I'm all right now"—she amended with a half-hearted smile—"There's still happiness...for her. Sure. It'll take a while before I—Daddy and I—get over her...death... But we'll be by her side when she goes, wherever she goes...and we'll remember her too"—she grew quiet, her words coming out as whispers easily lost in a wind, if there was one—"as if she never died." Tears began to fall but she caught each with the swipe of her hands and cuffs and sleeves. "I have...hope"—she began shortly after—"that she'll be fine. And if she's fine then we are too."

Her body, as she talked, became stiff. Her back didn't touch the bench, her hands tense over her knees, her boots together like those who marched in the civil militia... She can't return to that girl again...the one who stood farthest from the group of schoolchildren. The one who refused to say a word unless she was called on by an instructor... I lightly placed my gloved hand over hers, turning it over so our fingers entwined and as I moved to lean on her shoulder, startling her, I said quietly but clearly—

"I don't know what I'm supposed to do but I do know that I'll be there for you—my father and I will be there for when it's just you two. However, remember that you can't keep this all to yourself. I don't want you to be like me, to end up like me, secretly despising other families because they had a mother along with a father." I couldn't help but say it out loud. If there was any chance for her being more open to me then I had to do the same for her. She loved her mother, and I had some love for mine under a smoldering hatred of her leaving...

"Then," she said, "did you hate me as well?"

"I hated everybody, honestly"—my voice lowered suddenly, as if I'd lost the will to even speak—"but I could never hate you. I can't hate anybody now." I moved from her side but our hands remained intact.

Her voice too lowered, the same went for her eyes. Her hand went tense under mine. "Why is that?" She repeated herself even though I heard her fine, stronger and uncertain.

"Because I couldn't find someone who could prove me wrong. You can't hate your parents, even if they did something wrong. I saw you with yours, saw how happy you were, and felt, at first, so much anger but found out after how sad I really was. What I'm trying to say is that I found you—even though you didn't know—but you have me there—here—already. Understand?" I wasn't sure how these words got out—nor was I sure if I understood them correctly (though it made more sense the less I thought about it)—but it seemed to be working.

She was set at ease after but I had a drop of regret for not thinking over my words. I mean, there's something wrong when words just come out of your mouth right? Words you didn't know you could say?

She said something and I couldn't hear because I was lost in my thoughts. I asked her to say it again.

"There's still happiness."

+ + +

That was the last Heaven's Night we spent together. She and her father had moved several months into the fall to one of the walled cities beyond this tiny town.

+ + +

Dreams. Hope. Heaven's Night... All make me think of fairytales. Can this town, it's civilians; is this all a big fairytale? If that's so, let it stay that way, if not for me then for everyone else. Then if not for everyone else, let it be so for her.

I don't know. :D Felt like posting something I've been laughing at for a while.


I never liked Peeps anyway.

Ooh, check this out too!


Congratulations on the 1000 views Luna! I came across it randomly, hope you don't mind :3

It's just about to be midnight (like 3 minutes) and I just got to writing/brainstorming technically for that NaNoWriMo challenge and actually got an idea on what to write (it's actually a re-vamp of Crimson Red and I'm getting excited about it)...and that's pretty good motivation.

I'm still fixing the edits I designated for Ch.6 of LoF but I have no specific date for that to come out--I might work that in with the re-vamp but I'm not so sure...*ponders about it more*

But noes! Not an essay! or a district test that'll probably determine your quarter grade! *gasps melodramatically and faints on computer keyboard*

*gets back on feet an hour later and notices keyboard shaped imprints on forehead* I'm kidding on the things in the asterisks...but I'm feeling silly and giddy (ha, it rhymes) just with the prospect that the quarter will end, Halloween and November! In that month, besides the writing challenge, I have one week off for Thanksgiving and the month after that, I have two weeks off for Christmas and New Year's. It just suddenly came to mind when I was trying to manage my time-frame for this whole week.

Oh. I almost forgot...The first storm over here is coming in the weekend! And Daylight Savings (if I got the name right)...Bah. I'm rambling again when I'm supposed to sleep...

But, like the title, I'm only giving myself the time-frame of the songs I'm listening to how much I spend on this post. :-)

Songs:

"Aura" by Yuki Kajiura
"Shokobutsu Ningen M No Theme" by Miyavi (listened to this 3 times)
"Clocks" by Coldplay
"Misa no Uta (orchestral version)" by Hirano Yoshihisa

Well, my clock is almost up and as far as I can tell...my hair is a mess...and, I've probably made some grammar mistakes.

Don't sue me O Gods of English! *gets smacked*